This is my boyfriend Glenn, and his testimony that aired on the news here this week.
http://www.wtoc.com/global/story.asp?s=14175500
you'll have to copy and paste. not letting me have a clickable link.
Friday, March 4, 2011
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
I don't want to grow up..but I did...a little too fast.
I'm trying to get into the habit of blogging on a more regular basis. I have no idea how many people actually make it through my extremely long ramblings, but if for no other reason...its a journal of sorts for me. And at the end of the day..I'm so exhausted these days, the last thing I want to do it write....so typing is MUCH faster.
Life is happening at lightening speed these days. I feel like I'm learning more on a daily basis than my brain can handle, and I'm definitely not processing it as fast as I would like. Something happened today that caused me to reflect back on my childhood.
Now..my mom will be the first to admit to you that I came out of the womb with the spirit of an adult and I tried to be one from a very early age. Don't get me wrong, I have a few memories of barbie dolls and little kid things, but all in all....I FEEL like I was an adult from an early age. I grew up very quickly. I don't know if its just Birth Order, and being the oldest.....but there are definitely some moments where I would like to go back and experience "childhood" again.
In school I used to get really aggravated when kids acted like kids and often wanted people to "Grow up." And even more so as an adult, when childish behavior is displayed, my patience level is thin. I've heard from several people recently that when someone experiences trauma at a young age, they kind of become emotionally stuck there if they don't deal with it. They can revert back to some of that emotional and behavioral at whatever age the trauma happened. This makes sense to me as I see people on a daily basis who sometimes display this theory. There are many who didn't even have an option of "being a child" because of life circumstances and were forced to take on the role of an adult for survival mode. I remember when my Dad left feeling so resentful that my teenage years had been interrupted and everything had to change.....I felt like I, as the oldest, had to take on the other parental role. And it did affect me socially and emotionally..
There are a few individuals in my life with whom I can be "Silly"...but more often than not it takes EFFORT for me to truly let loose. I'm afraid I'll look immature or ridiculous and have trouble really laughing AT myself. But today as I watched a young woman chase a man down the street to take a picture with him and a giant inflatable ball that looked like the world, and watched her swing with the kids at the park....I noticed the joy that you would see on child's face. God was redeeming part of the lost childhood back. So in my attempt to be a kid..I got an ice cream cone, and took a picture on playground equipment, and tried not to care. I also took a picture with the guy and the giant inflatable world.
At almost 30, I want to remember what its like to have faith like a child. To have wonder and curiosity and uninhibited joy.
I think we could all stand to have a little more "Inner Child" in us at times....and I intend to find her again.
Here's to princess dreams, finger paint, ice cream cones, tea parties, and mud pies.
What was your favorite childhood activity? I'm open to suggestions and some recess friends for the journey.
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
I love Myself too much.
Did the title catch your eye?
I actually got the morning off and so I decided to spend some time in the Word and Bible Study. It has been a very eye-opening morning for me. I'm doing the study, "Lies Women Believe and the Truth That Sets Them Free" by Nancy Leigh DeMoss.
One of the Lies today that really made an impression on me was the lie that "I need to learn to love myself."
Now, if you're like me...you read that and think..."Why is that a lie? Shouldn't we love ourselves?" I've lived 29 years believing that I needed to love myself more and that I my low self esteem came as a result of not loving myself enough. Boy was that lie shattered for me today as I read further. Here is a little excerpt from today's reading:
" 'You need to learn to love yourself,' is the world's prescription for those who are plagued with a sense of worthlessness. It has become a popular mantra of pop psychology and of a culture filled with people obsessed with finding ways to feel better about themselves.....
According to the Scripture, the Truth is that we do love ourselves - immensely. When Jesus tells us to love our neighbors as ourselves, the point is not that we need to learn to love ourselves so that we can love others. Jesus is saying we need to give others the same attention and care we naturally give ourselves....
The reason some of us get hurt so easily is not because we hate ourselves but because we love ourselves! We want to be accepted, cherished, and treated well. If we did not care so much about ourselves, we would not be so concerned about being rejected, neglected, or mistreated....
Our malady is not "Low self-esteem," nor is it how we view ourselves; rather, it is our low view of God. Our problem isn't so much a "poor self-image" as it is a "poor God-image." Our need is not to love ourselves more but to receive His incredible love for us and to accept His design and purpose for our lives. Once we have received His love, we will not have to compare ourselves to others; we will not focus on "self" at all. Instead, we will become channels of His love to others."
This seems so basic yet so profound for me as I need to completely readjust my thinking. I've always almost prided myself on being a giver....but with such a distorted view of self, I think there are times in my life where I've really been a taker. Especially in relationship with others. If I am so focused on MY needs and I'm not confident of who Christ says I am...I am continually draining the people around me to try to fill me....and it's never enough.
But oh to have a hunger and thirst that is quenched by God when we actually lose ourselves.....for then....we will find it. Find Him, and find contentment.
I wrote Psalm 119:34 on my hand today to remind myself that I am who HE says that I am. Fearfully and wonderfully made.
Morgan
the Adventure of Waiting.
Sometimes I forget to update this blog because I'm so used to just doing it on Facebook....but here was My blog from Last week. I'll probably add another today.
There is a quote by Joseph Campbell that says “Follow your bliss, and doors will open for you that you never knew existed. Follow your bliss and the universe will open doors for you where there were only walls.”
I would like to edit this for my own purposes and say, "Follow God, and doors will open for you that you never knew existed. Follow God and HE will open doors for you where there were only walls."
This sums up the past couple of months for me. I have simply been in a time of waiting and seeking the Lord. Which for me, has been an extreme challenge, due to the fact that I do not sit still very well for very long. I don't usually associate "adventure" with "waiting." But I've come to realize that there can be an adventure in anything the Lord is doing. The season of waiting I went through was a season of preparing me for the next adventure He had just around the corner that I was not aware of.
Ever since my first summer in Vancouver, BC, Canada, I have had a heart for the inner city. And over the course of the past 9 years, God has continually developed and increased that passion. This past summer it was confirmed that without a doubt, that was the type of ministry He has called me to. Well....Urban Ministry is not an area that plasters job opportunities on Monster.com, if you know what I mean. And on top of that, especially in Savannah, GA. When I did find some type of social service job it usually was a case management position that required a degree if not a masters (which I still have to finish up). While it seemed the opportunities were scarce, I still had this gut feeling like God was going to do something. I even had to turn down a few jobs because I felt like He was telling me I had to say "No" at that moment in order to be able to say "Yes" later on. This did not make sense to a lot people. But for the first time in my life I was trying to Trust in a way I never have before. While I waited, I decided to start volunteering at the Old Savannah City Mission. This is a place in downtown Savannah that is a 5 star Gospel Rescue mission, whose mission is to:
To proclaim the Gospel of Jesus Christ,
To feed the hungry,
To shelter the homeless,
To rehabilitate the addict, and
To restore the ex-offender.
The Mission aspires to:
Establish High Standards,
Maintain Strong Boundaries, and
Give Clear Direction
They serve 3 meals a day, and have a few different programs available where men/women make a year long commitment to a residential program which focuses on spiritual and character development.
After volunteering at Thanksgiving, I was asked to help out with the administrative responsibilities for their program called "Fresh Start." Fresh Start is designed for men who have a coming or return to faith while incarcerated. After parole, they reside at the mission and go to classes, serve and work, worship, meet with case managers, and get their lives back on track to hopefully get rid of long term disobedience after transitioning back into world around them. There is a counter part to this program from women called, "A Place Called Home." I was told before Christmas that somewhere down the road there may be an opportunity for me to work there, but at the time, it seemed like a ways off. So I pursued other avenues and ended up getting a job right before I left at Lifeway Christian Bookstore. The day before I left California to come home, I received a phone call that the opportunity at the mission came sooner than expected and they were interested in speaking with me about full time employment as soon as I got back in town.
Long long story short, I started on Feb 1st full time at the Old Savannah City Mission. My job title is still being hammered out, but I think its going to rest some where around "Women's Program Case Manager." I am overseeing the Women's Program and doing all of the case management. It is a residential program and I actually live in a house with women who have been recently incarcerated and are committing to the one year program. As part of my job, I correspond with women who are still incarcerated, walk them through the application process, go to the jails/prisons for personal interviews, etc. Once accepted, I will work with them to create a case plan, teach classes, and live day to day life with them as they seek out the Lord and HIS WILL for their lives.
This is far beyond anything I EVER thought that I would do. It is WAY outside of my comfort zone and is causing me to have to lean on, press into, and trust the Lord daily. I live IN the inner city and hear stories daily that would honestly break your heart. I count my blessings DAILY that I have been raised in a godly home where I was nurtured and protected. And sometimes I feel like I have nothing to offer because I can't identify with the road and life these women and men have walked, but I know it is by no mistake that I am here. God sees something in me and has put something in me to be able to do this job and I just ask HIM daily to work THROUGH me, use me as a VESSEL, and get the GLORY.
Your prayers are GREATLY appreciated as I embark on this adventure. It is SO EXCITING. I LOVE what I'm doing, and what I'm LEARNING. I'm so thankful for the Old Savannah City Mission and the individuals who were willing to take a woman who didn't come with the degree or latest qualifications, and be willing to train, coach, and mentor me to be able to following the calling and desire God has placed in me.
If you live in the Savannah area and are interested in learning about how you can be involved in the ministry of the Old Savannah City Mission, please send me a message. I would LOVE to talk with you.
Stay turned for an update later on some of the exciting things happening in the near future. My love and thanks to each of you!
"God will make a way, where there seems to be no way. He works in ways, we cannot see. He will make a way for me. He will be my Guide. Draw me closely to His side. With love and strength for each new day. He will make a way. God will make a way."
Love and Blessings,
Morgan
There is a quote by Joseph Campbell that says “Follow your bliss, and doors will open for you that you never knew existed. Follow your bliss and the universe will open doors for you where there were only walls.”
I would like to edit this for my own purposes and say, "Follow God, and doors will open for you that you never knew existed. Follow God and HE will open doors for you where there were only walls."
This sums up the past couple of months for me. I have simply been in a time of waiting and seeking the Lord. Which for me, has been an extreme challenge, due to the fact that I do not sit still very well for very long. I don't usually associate "adventure" with "waiting." But I've come to realize that there can be an adventure in anything the Lord is doing. The season of waiting I went through was a season of preparing me for the next adventure He had just around the corner that I was not aware of.
Ever since my first summer in Vancouver, BC, Canada, I have had a heart for the inner city. And over the course of the past 9 years, God has continually developed and increased that passion. This past summer it was confirmed that without a doubt, that was the type of ministry He has called me to. Well....Urban Ministry is not an area that plasters job opportunities on Monster.com, if you know what I mean. And on top of that, especially in Savannah, GA. When I did find some type of social service job it usually was a case management position that required a degree if not a masters (which I still have to finish up). While it seemed the opportunities were scarce, I still had this gut feeling like God was going to do something. I even had to turn down a few jobs because I felt like He was telling me I had to say "No" at that moment in order to be able to say "Yes" later on. This did not make sense to a lot people. But for the first time in my life I was trying to Trust in a way I never have before. While I waited, I decided to start volunteering at the Old Savannah City Mission. This is a place in downtown Savannah that is a 5 star Gospel Rescue mission, whose mission is to:
To proclaim the Gospel of Jesus Christ,
To feed the hungry,
To shelter the homeless,
To rehabilitate the addict, and
To restore the ex-offender.
The Mission aspires to:
Establish High Standards,
Maintain Strong Boundaries, and
Give Clear Direction
They serve 3 meals a day, and have a few different programs available where men/women make a year long commitment to a residential program which focuses on spiritual and character development.
After volunteering at Thanksgiving, I was asked to help out with the administrative responsibilities for their program called "Fresh Start." Fresh Start is designed for men who have a coming or return to faith while incarcerated. After parole, they reside at the mission and go to classes, serve and work, worship, meet with case managers, and get their lives back on track to hopefully get rid of long term disobedience after transitioning back into world around them. There is a counter part to this program from women called, "A Place Called Home." I was told before Christmas that somewhere down the road there may be an opportunity for me to work there, but at the time, it seemed like a ways off. So I pursued other avenues and ended up getting a job right before I left at Lifeway Christian Bookstore. The day before I left California to come home, I received a phone call that the opportunity at the mission came sooner than expected and they were interested in speaking with me about full time employment as soon as I got back in town.
Long long story short, I started on Feb 1st full time at the Old Savannah City Mission. My job title is still being hammered out, but I think its going to rest some where around "Women's Program Case Manager." I am overseeing the Women's Program and doing all of the case management. It is a residential program and I actually live in a house with women who have been recently incarcerated and are committing to the one year program. As part of my job, I correspond with women who are still incarcerated, walk them through the application process, go to the jails/prisons for personal interviews, etc. Once accepted, I will work with them to create a case plan, teach classes, and live day to day life with them as they seek out the Lord and HIS WILL for their lives.
This is far beyond anything I EVER thought that I would do. It is WAY outside of my comfort zone and is causing me to have to lean on, press into, and trust the Lord daily. I live IN the inner city and hear stories daily that would honestly break your heart. I count my blessings DAILY that I have been raised in a godly home where I was nurtured and protected. And sometimes I feel like I have nothing to offer because I can't identify with the road and life these women and men have walked, but I know it is by no mistake that I am here. God sees something in me and has put something in me to be able to do this job and I just ask HIM daily to work THROUGH me, use me as a VESSEL, and get the GLORY.
Your prayers are GREATLY appreciated as I embark on this adventure. It is SO EXCITING. I LOVE what I'm doing, and what I'm LEARNING. I'm so thankful for the Old Savannah City Mission and the individuals who were willing to take a woman who didn't come with the degree or latest qualifications, and be willing to train, coach, and mentor me to be able to following the calling and desire God has placed in me.
If you live in the Savannah area and are interested in learning about how you can be involved in the ministry of the Old Savannah City Mission, please send me a message. I would LOVE to talk with you.
Stay turned for an update later on some of the exciting things happening in the near future. My love and thanks to each of you!
"God will make a way, where there seems to be no way. He works in ways, we cannot see. He will make a way for me. He will be my Guide. Draw me closely to His side. With love and strength for each new day. He will make a way. God will make a way."
Love and Blessings,
Morgan
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